oftentimes when I call my dad, my phone is turned up to the highest volume because cell reception is spotty in my apartment. I’m puttering about. my hands are busy cleaning dishes or trimming my split ends as I ramble through the details of my current conundrum. these phone calls occur because I’m consciously or unconsciously in a moment of transition. a place between other places. a crossroads.
I’ve always had a bit of trouble with transitory points (both micro and macro, literal and metaphorical) and my dad is well aware of this. he noticed early on I’d have anxiety before getting out of the car or paralyzing fear before stepping over the threshold of a classroom. this has evolved into general indecisiveness. I’ll stay in a relationship because it’s so hard to experience that week before and after the breakup. I’ll avoid quitting a job for far too long, in part to avoid having awkward conversations with coworkers.
when my dad pointed this quirk out to me, I was about 8 years old. he addressed it and promised we’d work on it together. it was my first brush with utilizing self awareness.
in present day, these phone calls conclude with me realizing that the waiting period is over and the inevitable time to act has come. I’ll say something along the lines of I guess I’ll do (irrationally scary thing) now. my father, who has listened patiently countless times while I hypothesize and self analyze will say yeah, well now is good.
it’s his subtle way of saying no time like the present! what are you waiting for?this is only as big a deal as you make it.
now is good.
this line echoes in my head as an unconscious rallying cry.
beyond my personal connotations, it’s a universal reminder to check in with the moment at hand.
it’s a chance to take stock of stories playing in the mind and recenter in the immediate reality.
this moment feels especially like a global transition. across the world, people are getting the green light to resume gameplay (otherwise known as being vaccinated). slowly, we are feeling into what it means to be social animals again. as we move forward into the brave unknown, it can be helpful to remember that now is good.
even if that means now is a good time to finally feel all the emotions that you’ve been unable to fully feel because they were just too hard to face.
now is a good time to recommit to living the way you wish to.
to commit, for maybe the first time, to experiencing life in the moment before us. rather than living one step ahead and two steps behind.
so. this project we are embarking on together is framed by the concept that now is good.
I’m most at ease when I am firmly within the experience of the now. I live for those moments of self awareness that overcome me with the perspective of oh yes, I’m here. this moment that exists is all that matters.
navigating the day to day, I find myself pulled in so many different directions by outside forces.
everything is designed to feel pressing. when confronted by so many things all the time, it can be really easy to forget the ephemeral nature of these things. as a result, being wholly in the now if even for just a minute, feels like a subversive, stunning, radical, revolutionary thing to do.
in these newsletters, I hope to conjure up a feeling of being here. if only for the duration of reading, at best, for a whole day.
the more moments we get, the better off we’ll be.
I’ll give you processes I’ve found helpful in getting there, personal stories that I hope will demystify this space and rituals to experience completely in the now.
if you’ve subscribed as a paying member, you’ll receive a weekly meditation prompt in audio format every Friday.
and now we have the interactive portion, everyone come together in a circle, hold hands…
no but really, I find that when I know other people are taking part in something, it makes it easier to do it myself. for our purposes, that something is experiencing the now.
throughout the week, if you find yourself completely in the moment, see if you can become aware of that. document the moment, consider it a ritual of awareness. you can either take a photo of whatever that moment contained or write a little sentence describing the scene.
submit these bits and pieces to momentsfornow@gmail.com and I will present the compilation of anonymous works each Sunday.
the Sunday dispatch will be a celebration of these fleeting magical moments. whenever we fully experience ourselves and life truly as in the moment, it’s worth all the fanfare.
thank you for reading thus far.
if you’re a paying subscriber, I’ll see you on Friday with a recorded meditation prompt.
and i’ll see everyone Sunday for our first Moments For Now Dispatch!
eternally yours,
James
So funny to think that this piece that you wrote 2years ago is resonating with me, a stranger on the internet, NOW, in our lords year 2023! hehe :) And how is it that I just exited a relationship that I held onto for far too long bc I was afraid of the week before and the week after? Us humans are interesting beings, forever avoiding the 'painful'. Glad to know I am not alone and glad to have found now is good 💘