after landing

3 poems to mix it up

triptych: in the airport for 7 hours

I am waiting for my parents 
on the second level
of the Phoenix International Airport
I’ve collected my dog, my coat, my luggage  
and found an arranged rectangle of chairs 

my parents 
are on their first solo road trip
in over 28 years.

they used to drive across the country
all the time 
in old cars, convertibles 
crossing the states 
no matter the weather

my first memory, 
was on their last road trip
when we drove from Nashville to Los Angeles 
I was two years old, 
and I can remember only
the husks of sunflower seeds 
hitting smooth asphalt
after we tossed them out the window
of the moving van 

so now I’m sitting on the second level
(of the Phoenix International Airport)
imagining my parents 
driving my 2006 prius 
373 miles 
to pick me up

my car’s aux cord stopped working months ago
so I wonder what they’re doing
music wise

—

Tucson loves the saguaro cactus 
that’s why we’re going

that and for the family

my dad’s only brother
and his wife
and his youngest son
sold their home in chicago 
and moved to the desert 

a  few years ago

we’ve only visited once before
and this year I’m trying 
to be more of an extended family member 

so we’re heading to arizona 

so I can play pokemon with my little cousin
and my dad can go to a basketball game with his brother

-

holidays tend to make me sad, 
one time 
I cried during the peak of a secret santa party
unable to grasp the joy

but as I get older
I realize 
it might be a performance
one that we all do

and sometimes 
for just a moment
we lose ourselves in the role
forget the lights are shining
forget the makeup and costume

and fully believe 
in something

today’s sunrise over tucson

that’s all for today—

xx
James